It is a therapy for the bereaved to talk about those who have gone on. This is good advice for visitors. Happy memories can be recalled; certain facets of their character remembered; and it needn't all be through rose‑coloured spectacles. We can talk about their dislikes and the times when they got cross and disagreed with us; talk about them, warts and all!
And life must go on. Bereavement must not be the signal to withdraw from life. A reasonable time for mourning is understood, and tears are also a part of the therapy. They should not be held back. But the threads of life must be taken up again.
Our loved ones would not want to think that their passing cast a shadow on us, so we must press on courageously, and where a widow or widower finds life intolerably lonely, it is not wrong at the appropriate time to take another partner in the Lord.