Then there can be loneliness. As one reaches a higher age bracket, news breaks of the passing of contemporaries, and friends and relatives. The writer's mother was one of thirteen children, and she attended twelve funerals before she died.
Loneliness can make the hours seem to crawl and bring one almost to despair. An old lady who was tempted to take her life commented, "The pain I can bear but not the loneliness". At such a time there is the need to develop a sense of the presence of God.
The prophet Isaiah seemed to have held King Uzziah in high esteem, almost to the point of hero worship, but when he died, Isaiah said, “I saw the Lord". For him it was a compensating experience. When human lights are extinguished, there can come a glorious experience of seeing more clearly the Divine Light.
During World War 2 I was stationed in Lincolnshire where several Christian servicemen were kindly entertained during off-duty hours by a local Methodist couple. They opened their home to us for fellowship, Bible study and Communion. After some of those times, the boys would fly off on operations to Europe, some never to return.
The ministry of those friends was of inestimable value, and some fifteen years later I was invited back to conduct Harvest Thanksgiving services in the Chapel there. I first made my way to the little cottage that held such precious memories, but what a different scene greeted me! The curtains hung untidily at the windows, and the garden had been neglected. My knock on the door was not quickly answered, and when it was, I discovered that the good lady had died, and the husband who welcomed me had gone blind; but despite his affliction and the loss of his loved one, his face was radiant and he was soon praising the Lord.
We must not forget the elderly. Sometimes even their sons and daughters are remiss on visits, and it really hurts when we are seemingly unable to care for ourselves, particularly if we are living alone. Many old folk have a sense of pride and independence, and they like to stay in their own homes as long as possible.
They like to be surrounded by familiar things and familiar faces; but some alteration of lifestyle, however hard to accept will be necessary when the time arrives.
Some are fortunate to find accommodation with their children and this calls for understanding on both sides, and tolerance is necessary. The arrangement can often prove to be of mutual help to both parties. Little jobs can be undertaken in the home, especially with the grand-children. One must be ready to accept that the running of the household will require give and take on both sides. Sometimes the house can be adapted to provide a 'granny flat' (Why don't we hear of 'Grand-dad flats'?) where the guest can have a greater degree of independence.
Local authorities do provide sheltered accommodation whereby one still has privacy with the possibility of meals-on-wheels, home help and not least, the security of knowing that a warden is on call at all times.
What about Eventide Homes? 'Going into a Home' always seems to have a sad ring about it. It sounds so impersonal and final, and there's some apprehension of what fife will be like there. Some Homes allow the residents to take a little of their own furniture, so as to preserve some identity, but the running of these establishments, whether by the local Council or private enterprise varies considerably.
So much depends on the management and staff, and if real care and compassion are lacking, the atmosphere can be depressing.
It must be pointed out that the residents can also affect the atmosphere. They can be awkward! Some really do enter a second childhood and exhibit all the tantrums of children. Petty jealousies and impatience do not help things, but in the case of the Christian resident, there is opportunity to show grace and cheerfulness, which in themselves constitute good witness.
There are, however, many good Christian Homes across the country. I have had experience with some of these and they must be commended for their high standards.
They are clean and efficient. There is good humour and fun as well as the important ingredient of spiritual ministry. A doctor visiting one of these Homes commented on the speedy recovery of one of the residents after a bout of illness said, "I put the recovery down to the inner spirit of the Home."