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After about 5 days, Jesca's condition had not improved so we were told that there was nothing else the doctors could do and did we want to turn off the respirator as she was only breathing 1 breath per minute on her own. We decided to have it turned off and to let her die peacefully. We were told that it could take up to 12 hours for her to die, as she would suffocate. I couldn't be there when it happened, I hadn't yet recovered from being ill from when Richard's parents had died. When we got home, Richard telephoned all the family and let them know that it was Jesca's last day. We telephoned the hospital all through the night but in the morning she was still alive and we were called in to see the consultant. We were told that it was not good news that she had survived, as she would not be able to do anything - in layman's terms, she would be "a vegetable" and would be on a drug called phenobarbitone to control her fits for the rest of her life. Later, at our first out-patients appointment, a new scan that had been done was shown to us. This had shown remarkable results. The quadrants had popped back into position and Jesca's history was being used in doctor's seminars to show the miracle that had happened. We were told that she would probably catch up with other children in her development but it would be a slow process. At this appointment, she was taken off the drugs as her fits had stopped. We clung on to the fact that this was because a whole church had been praying for her. So, for the next year, we thought everything was fine. Jesca would grow up normal and we would have a few hospital visits. But, at the end of the year, the doctor said that there was a possibility Jesca had a condition called Cerebral Palsy and he wanted us to hear those words in case she did have it. Just before Christmas, I had a smear test but the doctors delayed giving me the results. I was fragile anyway because of all that had happened but I demanded the results, only to find that they were positive and I was sent to the hospital for further investigation. The first problem I encountered was that the departments had moved around and I happened to be in one of the rooms Jesca had been in when she was in the special care baby unit. I didn't handle that very well and was taken into a side room to talk to the doctor. I was told that I could come back another time as I was so distressed, but I decided that I never wanted to go there again and it had to be dealt with there and then. So it was and further smears have proved negative. The next blow was when we had an appointment with the consultant paediatrician. Yes, Jesca definitely had Cerebral Palsy and learning difficulties. He explained that she should have a good quality of life but it would be disrupted by numerous hospital visits. When Jesca was 3, I had Taylor by caesarean section (this was due to the problems I had before), but as I was wheeled up to the anaesthetist's room, I realised that again, I was on the same floor where Jesca had been in the SCBU. This time, even though it bothered me, I was not distressed by it. A few months later, another friend, who was a Christian, invited us to a church camp weekend. We didn't have a caravan but that was arranged for us and we went. Jesca was 3 years old and Taylor only a few months old. We all had a really enjoyable time and Richard was brought to the Lord. He had become a Christian. Well, I was very confused by this! We had always discussed things together but this he had done without talking to me! For the next week I felt betrayed, confused and left out but it only took that week to see sense and exactly one week after Richard, I was saved too. Another blow soon hit us. As we had left our house about 5 years before (even though we had been advised to), we got a bill from the mortgage company demanding £22,250. We prayed and went straight to the Citizens Advice Bureau but they told us that it was correct and that we did owe it. After many letters to the mortgage company and a lot of prayer, we were allowed to settle the account for just £2000. Unfortunately, for the next few years, the stress of the things that had happened showed. I went into clinical depression, had acute anxiety and ended up in my bedroom. I was afraid to leave it, could not talk to anyone or answer the telephone. I was only a new Christian and found everything too much to cope with. It has taken years to get through to the other end of the black tunnel I felt I was in, but I know that it was all for a reason. Due to my many experiences, I feel that God had used me to be able to help others through similar situations. Jesca has had operations to correct her feet positions and enjoys riding her adult-sized trike. She has just won 3 medals at the special Olympics on her trike and in September she starts horse-riding with the RDA. Jesca uses a wheelchair and a walking frame but she is really sociable and absolutely loves going to church. The song "Almighty God, My Redeemer" has been dubbed Jesca's song as she loves it so much. She can be heard above the whole congregation, even above the people using microphones! For someone who we were originally told wouldn't walk, talk, sit, swallow on her own etc, it certainly shows that God had a hand in her recovery. I now work and am studying towards a new career. |
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© 2002 Watton on the Web part of
River Ministries
(Norfolk) |
